SouLe$$ Music is a record label from an alternate universe run by Morty "The Duke" Underwood.
ARTISTS
It all started in Jergins, Mississippi when controversial news anchor, Eely Pete, of Death News Channel 666 was arrested on fraud charges after allegedly breaking into the We Die Here! retirement center. It was speculated this morally lenient man of mischief invited himself to after hour visits, over the span of several months, to syringe blood from paralyzed patients with the intent of redistributing the blood, back to the facility, for personal profit.
Upon his check-in to the Jergins County Correctional Compound, he knew there was only one man who could possibly relate to his greed driven tactics of empowerment.
(phone rings)
"Duke Underwood, CEO of SouLe$$ Music. What the hell do you want?" -The Duke
"Duke, I'm in a sticky situation down at the correctional compound." -Eely Pete
"Who is this?"
"That's not important. I need you to bail me out and in return, I will supply you with an unlimited amount of bangers."
"Will they sell?"
"You bet your sweet ass they will."
And so it began... Eely Pete made a deal with the devil, recruited his co-anchors LoG and Colbonyx to assist in the musical endeavor, and little ol' Jergins Mississippi would never be the same, as it welcomed to existence...
Eliot & the Evening Noose.
In a spiritual warzone many worlds away...
the Kingdom was losing it's ground against it's arch nemesis, the VampEMPIRE, when the heavenly father called upon CLOUDLESS, The Spirit of Colbonyx, to embark on a crucial mission.
"Cloudless my son, the time has come for you to prove yourself as one of the great warrior disciples of this Kingdom." - Heavenly Father
"Oh Heavenly Father, what is it you need?" - CLOUDLESS
"Only good souls can be admitted to the Kingdom and we are running low on infantry. There's a man in Jergins, Mississippi named Duke Underwood. He is everything that is wrong with humanity. I need you to show him the light."
"But... Why?"
"If you can make even the worst of humans have a heart, it will show the others that there is hope for them too. Once more good souls are created, we can start to strengthen our army and claim our rightful victory."
"But how will I get him to trust me?"
"He operates a company called SouLe$$ Music. We're going to send you back to earth undercover as an artist where you will become the premiere "Spiritual Pop" act amongst the humans. After you sign a recording contract with The Duke and make him lots of money, he will trust you. And that my son, is when you will show him the light."
"But I've never even written a single song before."
"Not to worry my son, for I am a maker of miracles."
"I don't know if I'm cut out for this."
"You'll be fine. Just remember; it's for the greater good."
And so it began... Cloudless set out on the adventure of a lifetime to show Duke Underwood the light, prove to humanity there was still hope for them, and gain the spiritual soldiers needed to defeat the VampEMPIRE, once and for all.
BREAKING NEWS!!!!
"The jurisdictional district of Jergins County has ruled Duke Underwood INNOCENT in the ongoing investigation regarding his involvement in MANOGEN. It was speculated that the SouLe$$ Music CEO was supplying blood samples of various humans for DNA purposes to illegally produce CYBORG replicas...
From DEATH news, channel 666. This is Eely Pete signing off. Enjoy your night. And F$*# tomorrow."
...
"Yo LoG, I've been thinking. You know, maybe we should be HELPING the world instead of BROADCASTING its flaws, and never CONTRIBUTING to a solution."- Colbonyx
"What do you mean Colbonyx?" -LoG
"It’s OUR duty to let people know the TRUTH... and this could be our chance to serve the Duke justice once and for all!!!"
"Yeah, but HOW are we gonna do that AND work for him at the same time? We ARE kind of employed by this punk."
"Why don't we tell him we are going to write an album about HIM? He'll love that idea, and his ego is so big he'll probably even fund the endeavor. Then, we'll expose his evil ways just like the "SHAKES" used to do to villains in his stories."
"The SHAKES?"
"Yeah the SHAKES... William SHAKEspeare. We'll write the story of corruption through a character that will represent The Duke and expose him to the world without losing our jobs."
And so it began... LoG and Colbonyx set off to expose the heartless Duke Underwood in their crafty ways via the story of Rise
in...
Operation: GALIA SOCIAL
Along the outskirts of little ol' Jergins, Mississippi... Cloudless was drawn to the hauntingly beautiful and melodic sounds coming from the Forbidden Forest. He traced the sounds for hours until they led to the source; a broken soul and his piano.
"Oh broken soul, who are you? and what inspires such beautiful but yet painful sounds?" -Cloudless
"Sup bruh? The name is oTTo Loo$e, but the homies call me KEVELLI. I was once in love with an evil witch. Then I broke her heart and she burdened me with the curse of morphing into a monster at every full moon." -KEVELLI
"When there is dark, there is light my brother. There MUST be a way to reverse this curse."
"All I need is peeps to F&*k with my art and the spell will be broken. Feel meh? I'm dying to live again."
"Believe it or not, I think the man I'm traveling to see may be able to help the both of us. Come along oTTo..."
And so they were off... off to see the Duke... the terrible Duke of ol' Jergins ... but it was only a matter of time before Cloudless would learn the TRUE motives of the BLOOD THIRSTY BEAST and realize his intentions were not as pure as they seemed to be.
It was calm and peaceful in little ol' Jergins, Mississippi as the town began to shut down.
The wind was a blowin' and the breeze was a flowin'.
The Duke had just finished collecting the illegitimate earnings of his mud foot children employees for illegally trafficking gum ball machines when he looked into the distance and saw the silhouette of a cowboy riding into town...
On a golden cow.
The silhouette grew closer.
And closer.
And closer.
"Howdy Duke. The name's Spudd Brown, but down at the back alley midnight rodeo they call me Rossini and I reckon this town could use a party."
"I don't have time to talk about a..."
"I could make you ALOT of money."
"Tell me more."
"Well ya see, I done traveled everywhere cross this great nation North to South, East ta West bringin' parties to the people with my party gadget (points to computer). Once the people are havin' FUN they reach inside their wallets and graciously bless me with their hard earned fortunes. Then, I travel on to the next town and do it all again!"
"I like the way you think Spudd. Well, what the hell do ya need from me?"
"I was told that if I record some of my own songs to play through my party gadget at the festive gatherings, I could make even MORE money!"
"Looks like you've trampled into the right town cowboy..."
And so it began... Rossini and Duke Underwood became instant partners and for better or worse would soon revolutionize the American night life culture, one town at a time.